Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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