The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
How does one acquire holy water?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
