you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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