2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize