Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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