used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
