If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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