forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
