went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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