I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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