Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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