i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize