Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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