Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
