He is an equal opportunity slut.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
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