i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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