I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
