fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize