If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
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