If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
