One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize