uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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