I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
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