i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
