I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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