I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize