at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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