woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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