at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
