awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
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