When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Of course I have a pirate flag
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
