Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize