I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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