So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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