I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize