Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
