You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
