Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
now i know why i became what i already was.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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