He kissed a someone with a penis
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
