She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
