What a fucking waste of an outfit
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea