do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
