i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
