Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Randomize
