Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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