I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize