No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize