I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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