She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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