We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Panties = found
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