He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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